With great sadness, we left Alleppey (still not really sure how’s that spelled) and headed on to Cherthala. We were so sad to leave our amazing hosts, they were so great. They even rushed us to the hospital at midnight and took the best care of us. We will never forget their kindness.
My six am face is not a pretty one. One of my favorite parts of staying with host families is learning about their lives and relationships. We are all very intrigued by the cultural differences in marriages here, so we are always so excited when couples open up about their own story with us.
Roby told us that their marriage was arranged and he had five minutes with her before he had to decide. He said they didn’t even have a conversation, but he saw her and knew in his heart. They were were one of the most affectionate couples we have met and she was one of the few women who would actually sit down and eat with us. They were so kind and so much fun to be around, we will miss them dearly.
We had our usual farewell breakfast. The sadness was briefly lifted by this little nugget:
How mischievous is she? They finally pulled us out of there and into the van for a short ride to our next stop.
When we arrived in Cherthala, we immediately went to visit a Coir factory. This is where they actually process the coconut husks to make rope and the materials my previous host father used to make his mats. Yajaira (pronounced yuh-hide-uh) learned to make rope from fibers. I never gave much thought to the actual creation of thread and rope, but it was quite interesting. Everyone enjoyed quite the laugh at our expense.
After all of that work, we were swept away to Ayurvedic massages. Vanessa and I were so excited, we had no idea what was coming.
So, that was the experience of a lifetime. I will never ever forget it. When we walked in, we were immediately stripped of everything by two teeny tiny women. And by stripped, I mean “oh hi tiny strangers, I’m naked now and this is awkward.” I was so bewildered that I just gave up and follow the small ladies. They then laid me on this wooden table and they started pouring oil all over me.
I could not stop laughing. The oil tickled and I felt so uncomfortable that all I could do was giggle like a lunatic. Just as I started to relax, they started running their hands over me in very fast and firm strokes. This was fine and all except for the fact that I was slathered in oil and I started sliding uncontrollably all over the table. The two women (whose combined weight was roughly half that of mine) could not keep me in place. I felt like I was in a greased pig race. I was pretty mortified.
The awkwardness endured for about an hour during which time I was told to relax about 900 times. I cannot relax, I am naked in front of like four strangers (people kept coming in and out). I also got jabbed in my rice gut for “sucking in.” Oops.
The most humiliating moment came at the end when they bathed me. Like soaped me up, washed my hair, and dried me. Like I was a small child. I just kept looking up and praying for the end. I’m a very modest person and that experience definitely raced right past my personal public nudity boundaries. Thankfully, once I was safely dressed and alone again I felt absolutely amazing. I would definitely do it again, I just wish there was some kind of “FYI you will be totally naked and touched by several small strangers” sign.
After we survived that ordeal, we quickly cleaned up and headed out to our evening Rotary meeting.
Four hours later, we were starting to lose it.
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I am LOVING these updates. I spend a lot of time nodding and smiling knowingly as I relive moments from my time living in Sri Lanka. But your description of the Ayurvedic massage was just FANTASTIC and my face hurts from grinning. You are definitely one of my favourite bloggers! <3
That’s not how MOST websites describe the “3 women and a bottle of oil” story…
Sorry, Justin.
Oh, still wondering how to spell “Alleppey”? Turn around and look at that sign.
LOL. That’s awesome.
When she told me that story I was wishing I could of possibly video taped it…Sold it on the internet.. When doctors go wild.. in India. But the better half of me said nay. But I agree with you Dave, not the image I had in mind.
Oh man, I was dying at the oil massage. That would make me soo uncomfortable. At first. And then I’d probably like it.
And I love stories like that about your host family! LOVERS.
I’m loving all your India posts you cheeky minx!
Oh I would not like that massage! Do their Rotary clubs have women or are they all men?
The Rotary Clubs here are all men. They have a sub-group called “The Inner Wheel” that is women. Our meetings are all men most of the time. The meeting is also usually conducted in Malayalam which makes it really hard to know what’s going on.
LAUGHING. SO. MUCH. Reminds me of the time I had a gyno exam at a hospital and the doctor asked me if some interns could come in to observe. They spilled into the room like a herd of cattle. I told them they all owed me dinner. Rat bastards never came through. Some bedside manner…
Ask them about an Ayurvedic cleanse! It’s like a colonic and stomach pump all in one. you could have had it much worse.
HAHA god
I was hysterically laughing. Thanks for sharing your unusual experiences. :)
I just realized when you get back, you’re going to have 3 episodes of Walking Dead to catch up on. Yay!
Also, when I had Rowan, it was right around shift change, so I think everyone in the hospital decided to come into the room and watch the miracle of childbirth… and see my business. Luckily I was too busy to care. I might be able to get past the embarrassment for a massage though…
These posts are the greatest tour through India, I swear. I wonder if there are “official” Rotary peeps reading your posts. That could be funny. Or not.
Greased pig… thankfully my office door is closed so no one heard my snorting laughter. I think.
Now if I asked her for one of those massages she’d tell me to get bent.
And if she said yes, then what…? How exactly would that work, fellow, logistically speaking? I’m curious ;)
Sonja, some situations are best left unsaid. I doubt she could even get me on the table without me saying “you know lets skip this whole massage part and do … MATH” . You + Me = US
You seem to leave an awful lot of situations unsaid… juuuuust sayin’.
I have zero clue what you are even talking about. If you are referencing this past fall, you are really barking up the wrong tree.
Ha! No.
Also, “barking up the wrong tree” doesn’t make any sense here… I would be correct to bark up your tree if that’s what I was referencing.
you know what doesn’t make sense? you. That’s all I got for this comeback. I’m exhausted.
Please tell me you are referencing 2gether with this comment (u plus sign. Me equals sign. Us.)
Obviously… 2gether the greatest boyband ever!
OMG…Cannot stop laughing at the oil massage gone wild. You have all the fun. And with that one, better you than me! Strange people touching me–even nice people–not gonna happen.
Glad you are having so much fun AND sharing it with us.
Massage – yes.
Buck naked…no cover…strangers – no way.
Thanks for more adventures! Love keeping up!
I love the story about the arranged marriage. My friends parent’s marriage was arrananged and her mom explained that eastern marriages start cold and get hot while western marriages start hot and get cold.