Yesterday I went to the doctor’s office and forgot to bring my book to read. Game over.
That is the worst. THE WORST. I get so excited for appointments and flying because it’s like super bonus reading time. But when I forget my book, I just become bewildered and sad. It’s hard to function after that. I’m surprised I haven’t been prescribed an anti-depressant during the subsequent meeting with the doctor.
In triumphant news, yesterday I had my first gyro ever. Justin Timberlake came to me in a dream like a beat-boxing angel and told me to eat one. Who am I to argue with that?
I still can’t understand how his shirt was so wet, yet his wings were dry. The heavens are a mystery. Anyway, he showed me the light and that thing was amazing. This could be a potentially dangerous discovery.
In traumatic news, I haven’t been sleeping much the last few nights. I’m exhausted and I look like death.
In triumph, this lack of sleep has enabled me to re-watch the entire first season of Game of Thrones. So at least I accomplished something.
God I love that bitch.
In even more tales of triumph, I’m taking a nap tonight before Hunger Games. Win win win. No way that can go wrong.
In triumph, I completed a total of 53 burpees during a 10 minute workout (which included 60 back squats) at Crossfit. Kind of felt like the most powerful human on earth.
Tragically that is not true. I felt like I was going to die after about six of them, but those first six were badass. And today I can’t walk. Triumphantly, I’ll spend the next 11 hours sitting on my ass.