WTF Wendesday

When I was looking at things to do in Vegas I realized that Garth Brooks was going to be there! I literally shook with excited while I logged in to buy tickets. Unfortunately, they were $345 EACH.  WTF!!!!!!! I felt like I was having an aneurism. Ugh so RUDE. I was so excited to finally have a place to wear my t-shirt again.

(this isn’t me – my arms are way hairier- but I have this same shirt at home safely stowed in a drawer with my New Kids on the Block shirts). And this poster may or may not still be up in my closet….

Man I love some Garth. Are you an independently wealthy Garth fan looking for a date who is both awkward and strange? Call me.

Sarah was searching for anti-chafing options on Amazon and came across this gem:

There are no words. They should make teenage girls wear this. Would really prevent a lot of “unexpected blessings.”

The Duggars are expecting their 20th child. Seriously that sounds like my worst nightmare. I totally understand the accepting the children that God gives you and what not, but oh my goshhhhhhhhhhhhhh that is so many humans in one house. I really don’t care as long as your children are properly cared for, but damn that’s a beating for her lady parts. Does she just have to sneeze to give birth?

Adriana Lima is a maniac when it comes to preparing for the Victoria’s Secret fashion show.

Adriana Lima admits she goes to dramatic lengths to perfect her body in time for the annual show – including working out twice a day and living on a diet of protein shakes made from powdered eggs. The mother-of-one also drinks a staggering gallon of water a day – and no liquids for 12 hours ahead of the show on Wednesday.

Adriana, 30, told The Telegraph: ‘No liquids at all so you dry out, sometimes you can lose up to eight pounds just from that.’

The model has spent countless hours in the gym boxing and lifting weights, working out every day from August and bumping up to twice a day three weeks before hitting the runway. For nine days, she will have no solid foods.

So that sounds like straight up hell.  I would be dead. So thankful my body has nothing to do with my career because I would be unemployed.

Mario Lopez, WTF are you doing with a  shirt on after the marathon?

My roommate Caroline is sick. If she spreads it to me I’m going to have to suffocate her with a pillow to exact my revenge.

41 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized, WTF Wednesday

41 Responses to WTF Wendesday

  1. Adriana Lima sounds like a delight on Friday nights out with the girls.

  2. OMG that anti-chafing underwear is hilarious! I ran 10km last night (furthest ever – go me!) and am considering a half-marathon (somebody stop me!) so reckon I might be in the market for something like this pretty soon

    GOLD!

  3. The anti-chafing get up is amazing. Could they make it a little more hideous? The wrinkled granny panties are a nice touch.

    Also – that workout/diet plan sounds horrible. Maybe I will try to remember it next time I wonder why I can’t look like her. It is really nice to hear someone being honest though. Not “Oh, I ate three cheeseburgers and a pan of brownies last night, I just look like this”. Hate those girls.

  4. I laughed out loud at the Duggars picture. too funny!

  5. Michelle Duggars uterus probably resembles ground meat at this point. Seriously wtf.

    You know some fool stylist compared Adriana Lima’s diet to a marathon diet. Errr?! I eat carbs. Lots of them. And solid food. And I drink.

    That chafing underwear is too much. And they sell it in a three pack.

  6. OK so everyone wants to badmouth Adriana Lima for starving herself for 9 days, but at least she admits to it.
    I hate the whole “I just have good genes, eat cheeseburgers, and don’t work out” comments.

    PS- I have had to randomly check your blog for new posts because it didn’t update in my google reader… well for some reason, today it did!

    • Reese's Runner

      I totally agree, thanks for being honest. There are some people who do have that ability, but the rest are either starving or snorting coke for dinner. I always thought being a model might be fun…. um never mind.

  7. Doesn’t anyone think that all of those straps might chafe? So really, you have just migrated the problem.

    Thank you for reminding me about water today. Off to eat a bagel thin.

    The Kidless Kronicles

    • Reese's Runner

      I was wondering what they would do to my back fat. Looks like you are setting yourself up for some serious cutting.

  8. I love how they show the anti-chafing device on someone with 4% body fat. Like she really needs it — her thighs *obviously* don’t touch. Great marketing there.

    • Reese's Runner

      That is EXACTLY what my roommate and I discussed. Can I see someone who’s thighs actually touch and who has some jelly in the belly in that thing so I can get an accurate sense of what that will look like. And what happens when you sweat through that clothe. VOMIT!

  9. I have a friend who saw Garth in Vegas and she said it was unbelievable. It’s like an “unplugged” type of show. He took audience requests, did Q&A and even brought Trisha out for a couple of songs. She said it lasted almost 3 hours. But I still don’t think I would pay $345 for a ticket, even though I heart Garth.

  10. Kara

    Haha I love the picture of Bardot (sp?). It’s hard to tell Duggars to stop popping out kids (morally I mean), but seriously, someone needs put some damn contraceptives in her water. Also, how the HELL can Adriana work out twice a day without any solid food? I bet she’s miserable to be around during that time.

  11. The Duggars…ew! And seriously, I just couldn’t take the demands of being a model. We should take a moment to applaud her for her sacrifices.

  12. Sarah

    Props to Adriana Lima for telling the truth and not minimizing how hard she works for hot bod. Thats refreshing to know she admits the lengths she’ll take versus model’s who claim “I just have good genes, I wake up this way…” umm I call major B.S. with a side of WTF

  13. honestly, I always talk about how we’re destined to be best friends, but this proves everything. my very first song I ever knew was friends in low places. at the tender age of 3. and I’m pretty sure I know every single song of his by heart. my parents clearly know how to raise a child well on old school country western.

    let’s just go sneak in. ain’t goin’ down till the sun comes up.

  14. Adriana Lima is nutz! What person in their right mind avoids liquids all day long. I am suprised she hasn’t passed out on the runway. Way to be a roll model for teenagirls!!
    OMG that anti-chaffing contraption! That is so funny!!

  15. I’ve read this Lima crap 4 times this morning. I am PISSED that I like to run, eat and not collapse from dehydration or starvation.

    Otherwise I would TOTALLY do what she does. :/

  16. Sarah

    I saw Mario Lopez once in Vegas and my world was shattered. He is one of those 5′ tall pocket-sized guys! Now all my happy Saved By the Bell memories/fantasies are effing ruined. I do not put up with shortness.

  17. OK, the real wtf is why did they put that model in the anti-chafing outfit?! She is so tiny that she most definitely does not have enough jiggle to necessitate chafing! Another wtf is that I still can’t get my google reader to find your new blog! It’s missing every morning no matter how many time I re-enter you in :(

  18. So you realize that we will be sneaking INTO the Garth Brooks concert while we are there – right?? Or doing something illegal to see him I had NO idea he was going to be there – but I love, love, love him (wedding song was Garth Brooks – and not by chance) and now I have a partner in crime! (Dan can go hang out and share ice cream with Paula/Fabian)

    I do not get that anti-chafing model. At all. Besides the fact that she wouldn’t chafe if her life depended on it – but why not just wear compression shorts instead of that getup??

  19. Amy G

    This whole post made me laugh out loud (not unusual when I read your blog!). The “undies” were a riot and I had the EXACT same thought about the Duggers. When she gives birth I have no doubt her uterus will fall out as well. I just can’t imagine that kind of stress on my body 20 times!
    p.s. hope you find the wealthy person to take you to Garth!

  20. Oh man, Garth looks so young there. I feel dirty looking at the poster.

    If I was in the Victoria’s Secret fashion show I wouldn’t touch liquids for a week. One sip of water and I bloat like Violet Beauregarde.

  21. rache

    ha ha ha ha ha, wow, that underwear sure would be a treat !!! :) :) WTF indeed!

  22. Newer reader, first time commenter! Your blog is awesome, BTW.

    Those anti-chafing underwear are too much, I can’t even handle how hysterical those look!

    Too bad Garth is so outrageously priced, I don’t know if there is anyone I’d pay that much to see. Maybe Kenny Chesney or Bon Jovi. Maybe.

  23. The Duggars should be glad they have that TV show, or they’d be sooo screwed financially. Not to mention, the fact that their last child was born premature and was very sick for a long time should make them consider that maybe her reproductive system is not at a point where it needs to be having children anymore. But whatever- their choice, not mine.

    Adriana Lima is cray-cray. I bet it sucks to go from a gallon of water a day to nothing! She must be thirsty!

  24. “unexpected blessings” – hysterical.

  25. Jenna

    Just realized that you were missing from my Google Reader, and had to catch up on your past two weeks! Sorry to hear about you and Brian, but as I’m sure you have heard a million times, it will get easier. If you decide against the Austin half, you should just do this — http://www.austin1020.com. Beer and BBQ at the end!

  26. Jenn

    Someone should give Michelle Duggar that underwear to prevent any more “blessings”.

  27. I heard that about Lima and almost vomited! At least now we know why they have such unattainable bodies… because no average woman in her right mind is ever going to do that!?!?! I can barely live with one human… let alone 21 more. GOSH… the amount of crumbs.

  28. Alecia (in Vancouver, eh?)

    Garth Brooks MAY be within your reach!! When you get to Vegas just find a “Tix4Tonight” booth…they’re EVERYWHERE. They offer last minute tickets for half price (that is, of course, assuming there are tickets left for the night in question). The lineup at Tix4Tonight can be long, but it moves fast and it’s worth the wait to save that kinda moola!

    I’m not sure where you found the price of $345, but on my last two trips to Vegas (both within the last two months) his tickets were $253…so, half of that ain’t so bad?

  29. I realized today that I hadn’t seen a blog from you in a week, so I freaked out and thought you had maybe gotten hit by a car. Nope, just WordPress!

    Also, at this point I feel like Michelle Duggar’s babies are just walking out. Homegirl doesn’t even need to push.

  30. Amy

    My husband was on steroids in the past, and thankfully he wasn’t on them for a very long time, because his mood was simply awful, so bad that I really didn’t want to be within a few feet of him because he took everything out on me. However, I stuck with him because I know how easy it is to take things out on the people closest to you at the most difficult times in your life (which I am guilty of as well) and just kept telling myself that this would pass, which thankfully it did as soon as he got off that awful medication.
    I don’t know if it’s too late, but do you think that maybe you can talk to Brian and tell him what you found out? I’m sure that he will understand, because it was definitely the medication and not you.

  31. Amber Faye

    HAHA I think I peed a little when I saw that caption on the Duggar pic “no one knows my name”. Sad, but hilarious, and most likely true!

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